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The New Weapons Of Saints Row: The Third

With its roots in gang warfare, the Saints Row series has always had a healthy selection of weaponry - pistols, SMGs, assault rifles, grenades...all of the genre standards. In addition to these traditional guns, some wackier tools of destruction like the chainsaw, satchel charge, sledgehammer, samurai sword, and a giant foam "pimp hand" have been available to players. Plenty of bloodshed happened thanks to the weapons we’ve already seen in the Saints Row series, but they’re nothing compared to what you’ll have access to in Saints Row: The Third.

Air Strike

Steelport’s three gangs will oftentimes become engaged in flashpoints, which see the gangsters coming together and partaking in some shady business. During our time at Volition, we saw a large group of Luchadores in a parking lot as they guarded palettes of drugs. Charging in with an AK and grenades might work if you’re skilled enough, but why risk it? With this laser-guided air strike, you can demolish large groups of enemies without directly engaging them. Simply use a laser to indicate where you want ground zero to be, and the area will soon be showered in what appears to be a napalm carpet bomb. What was once an intimidating collection of Luchadores turned into a bunch of scarred corpses with one of these strikes.

Predator Drone

Painting a target with a laser is a nice option, but why use that if you can personally drive an explosive package right into your enemy? Activating the drone will change the perspective to a top-down view similar to the AC-130 level in Modern Warfare. Standard bombs can be dropped with one trigger, while the other will release a smart bomb that you can precisely guide with the analog sticks. Destroying a high-value target with a standard bomb is a lot of fun, but it’s even better when you’re closing in on a vehicle from the perspective of a bomb you’re controlling.

RC Gun

Both the predator drone and air strike allow you to rain death from above, but this handy new weapon allows you to attack from the ground while still staying out of harm’s way. By shooting out an electronic bug, you can assume control of virtually any vehicle you see (it will initially control cars, but you can upgrade it to take over tanks and air vehicles). Once the bug is attached, you can drive the vehicle around just as you would if you were in the driver’s seat. You could take over a rival gang’s car and run over a few cops if you want to get them in some quick trouble, or fill a truck with explosives and send it into enemy territory if you’d like to deliver a bomb on wheels.

Upgrades

It was possible to upgrade some aspects of your weapons in Saints Row 2, but these bonuses were always tied to specific activities. Saints Row: The Third is going a different route, by offering a proper levelling system that opens up new perks and bonuses for purchase as you become more powerful. A standard shotgun can turn into the three-barreled Gravedigger if you have the cash, and assault rifles can receive scopes and grenade launchers. By upgrading weapons how you see fit, you’ll have much more say this time around when it comes to building your desired arsenal.

Sex Toy Bat

While it’s by no means the most subtle weapon in your arsenal, this floppy phallus packs a mean punch when used as a melee weapon. The top of this sex toy seems to have a mind of its own, wobbling around in a disturbing display of physics. Give a grandma a swift swing with this bat and you’ll witness a splash of blood and a body slamming against the pavement. It can’t feel good to get knocked out by the sex toy bat, but we think the insult may be worse than the injury in this case.

Sex toy bats and air strikes certainly won’t be all you’ll have at your disposal, as Volition hinted at several more ridiculous tools of destruction in Saints Row: The Third. We won’t spoil any surprises here, but the more sadistic gamers will have plenty to look forward to when the game launches this holiday season.

Keep an eye on Saints Row: The Third.